preoccupactions with mere surfaces. betrayals from the perspective of the person once used now moving on. almost not needing that someone/something anymore but still being pissed at them, moreso oneself, for not having seen said someone in the beginning for what they always really were. being almost there. the verge of becoming. the storm before the calm.

diseased fears of invisibility. insatiability and gossip. the reality programming, the gawkers on the highway who are the first to lookee-loo but would be the last to help when coming across an accident. indictments of our popular ideas about what it means to be special, associated "needs" + pursuits. what it feels like to detest it almost as much as detesting being a part of it all, + reaching the boiling point one day.

feelings of being an outcast paying the price for being genuine and uncorrupted. abandoned; fighting addictions and for survival in a state not of helplessness but more an environment where there is help - just from all the wrong places. the feelings of the skeleton in the closet.

snowballing out of control into anxiety bordering unexpectedly on the onset of the nervous breakdown avalanche. the moments of cracking of the mental snow and ice and that point of reckoning.

the brawl on the train bridge without water underneath. if a scream is let in the woods, with nobody around to hear it who cares, does it make any sound?

going through a phase; just a phase.

act 1: broken wings
act 2: the insomniac vs. the benzodiazephyr
act 3: puppetry, sanitation